Whoever Said Ministry is Easy

“I feel like I am about to perform on the stage of America’s Got Talent, yet, I have no talent.”  Those were the words that I said to my husband this morning as we drove to church.

Let me explain what happened. 

Yesterday I sent an email to a fellow blogger, stating, “If the Lord leads you to use me as a contributing blogger for your series, so be it.”  I fully thought that this blogger would graciously tell me, “thanks, but no thanks”.  However that was not the case.

She replied the same day and said that was awesome and she thanked me for being a guest blogger!  She put me down on her schedule to have my post on her blog for October 8^th and asked if I could have my article in about a week, along with my bio and picture. (gulp)

Yes, I answered God’s call but I did not expect this outcome!

My concerns:  How am I going to be able to do all of this?  And can I do it all before my deadline? 

I live in a home with not just 1 family, but 2!  There are 5 homeschooled kids who run through the house day in and day out, there are two women in the kitchen fixing meals, doing dishes, sharing the washer and dryer and two schedules to plan around, not to mention the 3 animals that live with us.  There’s no peace and quiet around here because it is like a 3-ring circus!  How am I going to hear myself think, let alone hear the Lord speak to me as I write this article?

What did I just get myself into?  I thought.

I share the news with my husband and he is thrilled for this ministry opportunity.  I tell him the topic is Marriage, and then as I started to share my fears, I begin to break down and cry.

“I can’t do this, I say.”

He thought I was being ridiculous.  “What do you mean you can’t do this?” 

One of my favorite topics to share and teach on is Marriage, yet I was filled with fear.

He said to me, “If there was any subject for you to write on that you know best, it is the topic of a Godly marriage.  You’ve written on it before and you’ve even spoken on it at workshops!  You’ve led Bible studies and you’re always encouraging women to be respectful and submissive to their husbands.”  “You love to teach on Marriage!”  (We even have plans in the future to write a book on marriage.)

“I know, I know, I tell him.”  But my issue is not that I don’t understand God’s Word regarding a Godly marriage; it’s just that when I write, it is God who leads me.  I don’t write with deadlines or specific topics, or a certain amount of words, etc.

I’m not in constraints when I write, because my writing ministry is Spirit-led. It felt like I was being forced to wear a size 3 pair of pants, when in reality, I’m a size 12.

Plus, I tell him, “I am writing with other bloggers; women who are writers and who have been doing this blogging thing for a long time!  I have only been doing this for 6 months!  I feel like now I’m playing in the ‘big leagues’ yet I am still trying to figure out how to hold a bat!

“Not to mention, I’ll be in the spotlight more and I’m not a spotlight kinda gal.  Did you know I need a bio and a picture of me?  This is all really uncomfortable for me," I tell him.

I think I started to hyperventilate.  I couldn’t breathe.  Why did I sign up for this?

Can God meet my deadline, I thought?

Sure, I could write some Scriptures and thoughts on marriage, but I want to have the Lord move before me because I want His thoughts, not my own. 

He knows what women will be reading the post that day. 

He knows whose lives need to be touched. 

He knows what marriages are suffering. 

He knows….

You might be wondering why this is such a big deal to me. 

Because I am about my Father’s business and I want to please the Lord.  I want to see His daughters strengthened, equipped, and encouraged so they too will want to pour out their lives like the perfume in an Alabaster Jar.

Well of course the Lord spoke to my anxious heart.  

Daughter, turn to your online friends.   Ask them for prayer because I will move.  The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.  James 5:16 Get their thoughts, insights and desires of what they would like to read about on the topic of marriage.

Okay Lord.

So, I will be guest posting at the Time-Warp Wife’s blog for her challenge called, “31 Days of Love”. Her challenge is for women to live beyond themselves, put aside their preconceived ideas of what romance should look like, and seek out true love that is sacrificial and intentional. 

For those that are willing to graciously pray for me, here are some specifics:

• ·       For the Lord to breathe all over me with not only the topic He wants me to write about but also the message that He wants me to convey to His daughters so their marriages would bring Him glory.

• ·       For me to be still so I can hear from the Lord (and for me not eat too much chocolate due to my anxiety (smile).  You know I just had to throw that in there!)

• ·       For the article to be short in length and the message to be clear.

• ·       For me to meet the deadline

• ·       For the readers to be drawn closer to the Lord.

There are various sub-topics to write about within the topic of Marriage.  My post has to be short so I can’t address all of these ideas.  So, if you’d give me your time, I’d like to get your perspective.

Here are some thoughts that have been swirling around in my mind:

• ·       Building Up Your Husband

• ·       What Does Marital Oneness Look Like?

• ·       Seeking and Obtaining Marital Oneness

• ·       Leaving and Cleaving

• ·       When You No Longer Respect Your Husband

• ·       Disillusioned, Disappointed and Discontented with Your Husband

• ·       Anger and Bitterness in Your Marriage

• ·       Fixing What is Broken

• ·       When Your Husband is Not Being the Spiritual Leader of the Home

• ·       Any other ideas

I would so appreciate it if you can leave me a comment.  Reply as ‘anonymous’ if you’d like or you can email me directly at:  respectyourhusband{at}joleneengle{dot}org.

So, I am casting my bread in hopes that the Lord's ministry will reach many.  Cast your bread upon the waters, for you will find it after many days. Ecclesiastes 11:1
 

 

Here I Am, Lord, Send Me...But Don't Send Me to Ninevah!

Have you ever felt that God has called you to a certain ministry that you were ill-equipped and unqualified to serve Him in?  Perhaps you have felt that someone else might be better suited for that particular task of ministry.   Maybe you don’t have the skills or abilities to do the job at hand, or worse yet, you have too many scars and you are too broken to be effective for your King?  Yet, He continually whispers to your soul, “Come, serve me over here”.  Again, your King and your God says, “You can do this, just get out of the boat and keep your eyes on Me.” You don’t have to be afraid, I am right here with you.  I will take your hand and lead you. 

For many years I have had the privilege and honor to serve the Lord in several different capacities ranging from a Sunday School teacher, a Bible study leader, creating and overseeing a ministry organization with my husband, and now writing for the Lord to encourage, equip, edify and affirm His children.  I can tell you from personal experience that writing for Jesus has been THE MOST DIFFICULT ministry that I have ever served in!  In fact, it has brought me to tears almost every time I write for Him (and I am in tears now).  I can’t tell you how many times I have cried out to the Lord telling Him I can’t do this because it is emotionally agonizing for me (and I am not an emotional person, I don’t gush easily.) 

You might be asking yourself why is it so hard for me to write and what is the big deal.  Permit me to let you in on some of my insecurities regarding this ministry. 

Issue # 1-  I was told at a young age that I was a poor writer and those words continued on into college when I had to take a college writing course 3 times in order to finally pass it.  Yes, I failed college writing not just once, but twice!  Because of what I went through in the past, I have always shied away from the pen and paper experience.

Issue #2-  Writing puts you in the spotlight.  There is no one else in the room, there is no crowd to hide behind or mix in with.  For any individual who likes to take center stage, they would probably love this, yet, that is not me.  I am a socially reserved person, in fact, if I were in a group setting you could find me in the back of the room where I would feel safe.

Issue #3-  Writing can be a vulnerable and transparent experience…one that is very uncomfortable because you are exposing yourself to others and some of the readers are complete strangers!

So, if it is so hard for me to write, then why do I do it, you might ask.

Bottom line:  God has called me to do it.  (Period)  No other reasons. 

It was 2 or 3 years ago when the Lord gently spoke to me and said, “You need to start a blog.” 

Here were my thoughts.  “What’s a blog?  How do I start one?  What am I supposed to write about?  I have nothing to say.” 

I went on with the busyness of my life, yet, in the back of my mind were my Savior’s words, “You need to write.”  I eventually found the time to investigate on the whole ‘blog thing’ and I finally started one last year but I didn’t really know what to do with it.  I wrote posts for it every now and then but I did not have much time, nor direction from the Lord to be very intentional about it.  Time went on and I heard His voice again.  However, this time it was louder, more clearly and more often, “You need to write.”

Okay, Lord, but I am too busy, something needs to change.  I can’t do everything that is on my plate.  Show me what to do and what to cut out.

Again, He said to me, “You need to write.”  I heard Him loud and clear!  I wanted to be obedient so I knew I needed to make some changes in my life in order to have the time to write for Him.

I often think of Isaiah when he heard the Lord speak, “Also I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, whom shall I send, and who will go for us? Then said I, Here am I; send me.”  Isaiah 6:8  When I read that verse I am so inspired to go where ever God sends me but when the rubber meets the road and the Lord calls me to do something that I do not feel equipped to do, will I answer the call?  Will I heed His voice?  Or will I be like Jonah, the reluctant prophet, who did not want to go to Ninevah?  

Sorry Jonah, but I’m goin’ with Isaiah!

Here's a glimpse into what God has already done in this ministry…The Alabaster Jar blog has been up on the internet now for a little over two months.  In that time, I have had the opportunity to be used by the Lord to minister to, and encourage women even when I did not feel equipped or qualified.  The blog has now reached 20 different countries.  I honestly don't know how that is possible.  "But with God all things are possible.”  Matthew 19:26 As hard as it has been for me to write these posts, God has shown Himself faithful to me as He has held my hand while on this journey.  I am humbled and honored that He has allowed me to be a vessel on His behalf. 

Even though I have had institutions tell me that I was not a writer, God has said otherwise.  He has entrusted me to help build His kingdom even when I doubted Him.  He is entrusting you to build it as well. You are needed for the Kingdom sake.  "Then Jesus said to his disciples,  "The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into His harvest field."  Matthew 9:37-38

It is Him that we should desire to please and it is Him that we should listen to. God does not call the qualified, He equips the called.  So, what is it that He is asking you to do?  He will be with you every step of the way and you will be blessed beyond measure as you serve your King.  You are needed to make an impact for the Lord.  Stop listening to the enemy tell you what you can't do!  Satan is very happy to keep you from serving the Lord with the spiritual gifts that God has blessed you with.  What is stopping you?  What reason do you have for not wanting to go to Ninevah?  Jonah's reason was because of his flesh.  My reason was because of my flesh and the fear that I had.  For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.  2 Timothy 1:7  I hope your flesh does not hinder you and I encourage you to step out in faith and be obedient to His calling.  You won't regret it!

The Work of Ministry Part 2

"And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ."  Ephesians 4:11,12

Well, I finally found some time to write Part 2 of this post.  In this article I wanted to address an issue that is not usually spoken of within Christian circles, especially in our churches or other various, Christ-centered, ministries and/or organizations.  The main issue that I would like to cover is when you are over-committing yourself in outside ministries.  What does that look like?  How do you know that is taking place in your home?  How can you prevent being over-committed again?  We often hear amongst our fellow believers to get more involved and use our gifts for the Lord, (which by the way, I am a BIG advocate of), but there is a Biblical order to ministry.  Read The Work of Ministry Part 1 for the details.

So, how do you know you are over-committed in a ministry?  I know from my own personal experience that my home life will start to fall apart if you will, meaning, my laundry will pile up along with the dishes.  Clutter will start to become like permanent fixtures and look like new furniture in my home as well.  All in all, the “Keeper of the Home” is no longer keeping it because I am too busy serving Jesus outside of my home.  My house, along with those that are living in it, are being neglected for the sake of outside service to the Lord. 

In the past, I have also found myself asking my husband for a lot of help.  Now, I don’t mean with just a few things within my day, but on going things like asking him to help with dinner, to help with the dishes, to help with the children, to help with the laundry, to get some groceries and to help in the ministry that I was involved in!  I noticed that I had asked him for so much help that he was becoming MY ‘helpmate’ rather than what the Bible had to say about me being HIS ‘helpmate’.   I was clearly outside of God’s will for my life.

So, today I have learned a few things about serving the Lord outside of my marriage, my children and my home.

#1  Keep a close eye on my walk with the Lord and make sure I spend plenty of time with Him.

#2  Watch my countenance.  Am I becoming bitter because I am over committed?  Do I snap at my husband and/or children when I come home because I am exhausted from serving others? This is what I would refer to as the ‘Martha Syndrome’.  “But Martha was distracted with much serving, and she approached Him and said, "Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Therefore tell her to help me." And Jesus answered and said to her, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things.”  Luke 10:40,41

#3  Be mindful of the Biblical priorities that is clearly defined in God's Word for me as a wife and mother.

#4  Keep a schedule so I will know if I actually do have the time to serve others that day/week/or month.

#5  Remind myself that it is okay to say 'No' when asked to serve.  I do not need to feel guilty because I can't do it all.

This brings me to my next point.  I have recently made a decision, (a very hard one I might add); to no longer continue a long-term, on-going ministry.  (That would be #6 on the list!  Think long and hard about being involved in a long-term, on-going ministry especially when you have children.  So, if you are a mother like me, remember the season that you are in will only be for a short while.  There are many opportunities and capacities that we can serve in that will not take so much time away from our husbands, children and our homes.  God uses us each and every day as we pour into our families.  He will ALSO use our talents, skills and gifts to further His kingdom outside of our homes as well.  But be mindful that you are not spending too much time away from your first ministries.  There are plenty of ways to serve Jesus that can be short-term, i.e., serving a friend in need, watching someone's kids, bringing meals to a shut-in, writing a letter to encourage a sister in the Lord, etc.) 

In closing, I have some questions for you and I do hope you respond so others who read this post can glean from your past experiences as well.

How do you know you have over-committed yourself in outside ministries?

What are some of your indicators?

Do you set up some boundaries?

Are you able to say ‘no’ when others ask you to serve?  Why or why not?

How to do you prevent yourself from being over-committed again?

The Work of Ministry Part 1

"And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ."  Ephesians 4:11,12

 

Isn't it nice to be needed?  To feel appreciated.  To use your talents, skills and spiritual gifts.  How about this one...to be used by the Creator of the Universe to further His kingdom and to bring Him glory?  I love ministry.  I love being used by the Lord to make an impact on His behalf for His children, but ministry is not always a wonderful feeling, it also takes a lot of hard work and dedication.  If you have been following the Lord for any amount of time, surely you have been involved in some type of  ministry during your walk with our precious Savior.  If you are a wife and mother like me, you serve Jesus as you minister to your family on a daily basis;  and yes, that includes cleaning toilets!   

I think it is easy for us Christian women to often forget what are the main priorities that Christ would have us put first in our lives before we over commitment ourselves in various outside ministries.  Let's look into the scriptures and see what the Word of God has to say about a woman's role and her character. 

"...the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things— that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children,to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed."  Titus 2:3-5 

Do you see the order of this verse regarding what a godly woman should be doing?

First:  It talks about our godly character, hence our relationship with the Lord.

Second:  we are to love our husband.

Third: we are to love our children.

Fourth:  we are to work on our godly character again and we are also called to be homemakers.

That's a lot of ministry for each day!  I get tired just thinking about all my responsibilities!  

Depending on the season of life that you are in, it will determine how much time you can allot for outside ministries.  Obviously if you are raising babies and toddlers right now, that in itself will require a lot of your time at home.  If you have chosen to homeschool your children, that will limit your involvement to outside ministries as well.

Listen to what the Lord is telling you.  If you have been serving in an outside ministry which is taking you from your first ministries, be obedient to the Lord's prompting and step down from your involvement, (more on this topic will be covered in The Work of Ministry Part 2). On the other hand, perhaps the Lord is telling you to get involved in a ministry, step out in faith and answer His call.

Most importantly as we pursue the Lord we want to honor Him by being obedient to His word.  So, in a nutshell, love Christ, love your husband and children and keep your home....then serve others!

I have just scratched the surface regarding this topic and I will write more in the coming days, but for now, my first ministries are calling me!