If Mary and Martha Were Homeschool Moms

Think about it for a moment. Now according to the Word of God, there was no mention of husbands nor children, so I think it is safe to assume that Mary and Martha were not married and did not have any kids.  So let’s pretend for a moment each were married and they had children they homeschooled. 

            What do you think that would look like?  We know from Scripture that Martha was busy doing and she was so demanding that she even demanded Jesus to do something!  That’s pretty brazen.  “But Martha was distracted with much serving, and she approached Him and said, "Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Therefore tell her to help me."  Luke 10:40

            We know that Mary was not busy ‘doing’.  When Jesus showed up at her house, she did not rush around picking things up to make the home look presentable.  She did the exact opposite.  She sat down!  She sat at the feet of Jesus so she could learn from Him and be filled by Him.  And she had a sister called Mary, who also sat at Jesus’ feet.  Luke 10:39  Doesn’t that sound so refreshing for a moment, to just be still and sit.  “But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her."  Luke 10:42

            How would Martha look as a homeschool mom?  Think about how she went about her day.  Busy, always doing.  Demanding of others.  Yikes!  That sounds familiar.

Picture Mary as a homeschool mom. Peaceful and calm, patient, loving, refreshed and wise with godly understanding.  She chose “that good part”.  Those words were spoken by Jesus, the King of Kings about Mary. That is the kind of mother I wish to be.  Yet, that is not always how I respond to my children. 

My first thought is to rush through our learning ‘to do’ list so I can check it off and move on to more important things.  I ask myself what are those “more important things” other than teaching my children the Word of God and discipling them.  (Yes, I know I have other responsibilities, but I am not referring to those times.)  I have realized that I have become like Martha as I teach my children, when in my heart I want to be like Mary, peaceful and calm.  I want to slow down and choose “that good part” for my children.  I want to pour things of eternity into their hearts and I want them to be filled with Jesus.  I don’t want to become anxious thinking that I have not done enough for them, that’s probably how Martha would have responded.  “And Jesus answered and said to her, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things.”  Luke 10:41  

May we be like Mary, choosing “that good part” when we teach, disciple and spend time with our children.                                    

Pressing Forward and Forgetting What's Behind

I just love reading through the book of Philippians because I am always so encouraged by what the Apostle Paul writes. The man was so real and straight forward. Not only did Paul have a past, but he also had a bad reputation and I would not be surprised if he felt a little embarrassed by it, seeing how he was known in the land for killing Christians; at least until his life was transformed on the road to Damascus! He, himself went through so many trials and persecutions that I think many believers can easily identify with him as they too face difficult times or circumstances. Yet, in spite of all that Paul had gone through, he always kept his eyes fixed on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of his faith. At this time in your homeschooling year, I hope you too will find encouragement by what he writes in the book of Philippians, chapter 3, verses 12-13, “Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead.” As the end of the school year is approaching I am sure you will look back and see your failures or perhaps your childrens' failures and become defeated in your journey; but remember that is something that the Enemy would like you to always feel as you homeschool your children. Yet, that is not what our gracious and loving Father sees in you, His precious daughter. What God sees is a woman who is living a life of self-sacrifice as you spend your days serving your husband, training your children and teaching them the things of the Lord, along with preparing them for a future of service unto the King of Kings. He sees you having the right heart attitude as you spend your days in the mundane, the day in and day out, a thankless job and sometimes what seems like no production of fruit, nor comprehension of the basic concepts that your kids will need in order to get through life. He sees you and He knows your fears and concerns. He knows what you battle through. He knows what you struggle with and what your children struggle with. Be encouraged to know that you are not alone in your thoughts, none of us have attained perfection in our homeschooling. You may look back and see where you should have used a different curriculum, where you could have spent more time on teaching the basics to your children or perhaps where you could have put forth more effort in training your kid’s character. Well, I have a saying, “Should’a, Would’a, Could’a”! God gives everyone a choice in how they are going to handle things. Paul had a choice too, he knew he was not perfect, so instead of lamenting on his failures, he “pressed on”. He did not use an excuse like, “Gee Lord, how can I bring the Gospel message to your people when I am known for killing them? Instead of complaining about his past decisions, he chose to “reach forward to those things which are ahead”. Do I think that Paul had regret from his past decisions? Absolutely, he was, after all, human! Just like you may have some regrets for the decisions you have made this past year, don’t let those things keep you from looking forward to next year. You are building God’s kingdom one day at a day with the little disciples that He has entrusted in your care. You have done your best to be faithful in this journey, something which is not always an easy task! So, have the mindset that Paul had when he penned the following: “I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:14

Embracing Life's Disruptions

I am sure all of us had the best laid plans as we started off our school year.  We prayerfully considered the curriculum choices that we made over the summer.  We felt confident that our children would love the topics we were going to teach them and we found new tools to help them in a subject they were struggling in.  The new pencils,  glue sticks and books were purchased for them so they would excel.  We were ready for a new school year and this year was going to be different because we were better prepared and had a better schedule to follow.  Yet, sometimes things do not go according to our plans, because God has a different plan.

            I am a planner and I love order.  I love to write things down in my calendar and school notebook and check each box off as the task or subject is completed.  When my plans come to fruition, I feel like it was a good day because of what I had accomplished.  Then of course I have had days that do not go according to ‘my’ plan.  I am sure every homeschool mom has had those days too.  Because my day has not gone the way it should, I usually consider it a ‘bad day’.  As I look back over this year, I would classify much of it as a ‘bad year’, according to my ways.   However, according to the LORD, He has a different view point.  “My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways," says the LORD.”  Isaiah 55:8 (NKJV)  I love the New Living Translation of this verse, "My thoughts are completely different from yours," says the LORD. "And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.  Isaiah 55:8  That verse just soothes my weary, fretful, “Am I doing enough”, homeschooling mom’s soul!   

We have all had bad days that did not go according to our plans.  Days when we have overslept.  Days when an illness strikes.  Days when a baby or toddler is constantly interrupting a school day.  Days when our schedules have been flipped upside down due to a disruption.  Yet, sometimes, those disruptions are exactly what God had in mind when He said in His word, “We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.”  Proverbs 16:9             

             God, in His infinite wisdom, brings about changes or ‘disruptions’ into our day.  Now, not all disruptions are from the Lord, however, some definitely are.  I am currently learning to be sensitive to, and recognize when, God has brought about a disruption into mine and my children’s day.  I still do everything I can to limit disruptions to our daily schedule, but sometimes they are unavoidable.  Though I have chosen what I prayerfully felt was the best curriculum choice for my children, there have been days when the LORD had chosen for them to learn about something other than the topic of ‘birds’ for that particular day.  Maybe he wanted them to learn about what cancer is because of what their grandma is going through or perhaps He wanted them to learn about serving and loving an enemy, or what it means when Daddy needs to find a new job, etc.  You get my point and can fill in the blank with your own ‘disruption’.

            As the school year is coming close to an end, I encourage you to embrace the so-called ‘bad days’ that the LORD has brought into your life.  Change your perspective from bad to good.  Is God’s hand upon this situation?  Learn to discern whether it is of the LORD or from the Enemy?  How can you use the situation to teach your children more about the things of the LORD while you are altering your schedule?  Be creative and do not give up in your thinking.  God is not surprised by the change in your plans.  He either sifted it through His hands and passed the ‘disruption’ down to you or He has allowed it to happen.

            As homeschooling moms, I think we feel easily crushed when we are constantly off our schedule or behind in our lesson plans.  That thought process will quickly snowball into a new way of thinking and questioning of our homeschooling abilities and/or perhaps our commitment to continue to homeschool our children in the future.  If this is where your mind is today, I implore you to go back to the Word of God and seek out the Scriptures that convicted you to homeschool in the first place.  Let God speak His truth into you heart and mind so you don’t feel defeated and attacked by the Enemy when you are experiencing a ‘bad day’. 

            Change can typically bring growth.   Just because our children are not learning a subject from a book at that moment, does not mean they are not learning and growing.  Don’t lose heart about the current situation your school year has been in, press on and do your best to get back on to your schedule, but  when God brings a disruption,  embrace it, for it might even draw you  and  your  children closer to the Lord.  “As for God, His way is perfect; The word of the LORD is proven; He is a shield to all who trust in Him.  Psalm 18:30

As For Me and My Treehouse, We Will Serve the Lord

As a parent, the daily example of our attitudes and actions speak volumes to the shaping of our children’s character.  Our kids learn so much of who our Heavenly Father is by the relationship WE have with our Lord.  I am sure you have heard of the popular saying, “more is caught, than taught”.  I often think of how Jesus taught his disciples as he just spent time hanging out with them, walking with them, sitting in a boat with them and finally, showing them His ultimate love and sacrifice as He went to the Cross.  He is the Great Teacher.  In the book of Matthew, chapter 10, Jesus is giving his disciples authority to cast out demons, heal the sick and instructions on how to go out to preach the Gospel.  He gives his boys a list of do’s and don’ts and then He says in verse 24, “A student is not greater than the teacher.”  Of course the disciples are the students in this verse and Jesus is the teacher.  Jesus goes on to say in the chapter that it is because of the teacher that the students will become persecuted.  In other words, the student is taking on the characteristics of the teacher.  The same premise applies to our lives as we are the student and Jesus is our Teacher.  Let’s go one more step further, we are the teacher and our children are the students.  They will take on our characteristics, sometimes good and sometimes bad! 

There are several items in our home with the popular scripture verse, “As for me and my house we will serve the Lord.  Joshua 24:15  This verse has not been something that I have purposefully sat down and taught  to my children.  They have just seen it displayed in their surroundings ever since they were babies.  As they have grown older and have become capable of reading and comprehending this scripture, I am amazed by how they have applied it to their own little lives as they have watched how their father and I live what we believe no matter how difficult life may become.  Let me share with you a few recent examples of how my teaching-conduct impacted the lives of my student-children, for both the positive and the negative.

Our family has recently moved from my dream home.   When we purchased this home, I envisioned having our children growing up in it and then some day Lord willing, having our future daughter-in-laws and  grandchildren in it for family gatherings and holiday celebrations.  There were plans for the home to be used for ministry and of course plans to grow old together with my husband in it.  That was my plan for our family’s future and the dream was shattered.  However, as hard and painful as it was to go through, my vision was, and still is, at times shortsighted, because God had a better plan for our family.  As we endured this financial trial for several years, we had a choice in our attitudes and actions, we could complain about our situation or accept that God had something different and better in mind for us.  By the way, God is ALWAYS smarter than we are, because He is the Teacher and we are the student! 

Anyways, as we signed a lease agreement for our rental home, the Landlord asked us how the kids were handling the loss of the home, and in my mind, I found that to be an odd question.  The reason being is the last few years we have been preparing our children that at some point, Jesus will move us to a different home.  What we did not do is teach our children to throw a tantrum when things don’t go our way and we did not show our children to doubt God and be consumed with fear and anxiety of what our life would be like.  We were teaching the young disciples to have faith in a Great God no matter how things do not go according to our plans. 

So, this is what my older son caught in the midst of this trial.  He embraced the situation with child-like faith and saw something good.  He is so very excited to move to this new home because there are giant trees in the backyard and he has always wanted to build a treehouse!  Later that evening he came home and wrote in his finest penmanship, “As for me and my treehose, we will serve the Lord.”  Joshua 24:15  Yes, he spelt hose, instead of house!  After seeing what he wrote for the first time, I saw such excitement in his heart for the Lord.  Now, of course there was that twinge in my mind for the misspelling of the word ‘house’, but I realized that his heart was right and I just gently taught him the correct spelling of the word.  As the Enemy continually attacks me for not teaching my son well enough because he could not spell the word correctly, the Lord gently reminds me of my son’s growing, godly character which will prove far more valuable in life.

Now for the negative example of me as a teacher...after the Lord blessed us with the wonderful gift of this rental home, I decided to act like an ungrateful child who did not appreciate the gift rather than being content and thankful for it.  I referred to the house as if it were a “pig with lipstick”, in other words, it was nice in a few places, but overall, it was like a pig!  My younger son caught on to this negative attitude and he informed my husband that he did not want to move from our current home because the new one was crummy!  I don’t think I will be receiving the ‘Teacher of the Year’ Award for that example!   Needless to say, he learned the negative attitude from his teacher.

Your children’s understanding of the Lord is what they see in you and what you teach them.  They are always watching, perhaps not very intentionally, but watching none the less.  So, you always have a choice in any and all situations that you are in, you could have faith and be thankful for all that God is doing in your life or you could throw a tantrum, whine and complain, be fearful and full of anxiety and teach your children those attitudes just as well. 

My hope and prayer for you and your family is that you do the best you can to be a reflection of your Heavenly Father to your children, it is through that growing process that you will become like The Great Teacher and your students will become like Him as well.

Christian Homeschooling...Satan's New Stronghold

By Eric Engle

            The other day I was considering Christian homeschooling and the significance of it in our homes and our society.  Why do we homeschool?  To protect our children from the world’s evil influences, to pull them out of the low academic standards of the public school system, to keep them from being bullied and to instill good moral values; all of which are great reasons.  As we look down the road several years from now, who wouldn’t be pleased with a son or daughter who received high grades, was protected from emotional and physical harm and did not get involved with the world’s garbage, plus they had a very high moral standard?  Employers love this well rounded, well taught employee.  Grandparents love this well adjusted, well mannered young person.  Satan is especially pleased with these accomplishments, because the more we esteem these attributes, the less we have need for the Savior.  When Satan tempted Eve in the garden he twisted the Word of God just slightly to stumble her.  Not a complete lie, just a slight move from the center of God’s Word.  Was she paying attention?  Or was she consumed with peripheral issues to miss the heart of God’s word?  Satan’s best tactic is to get us close enough to the truth that we feel comfortable and safe enough to miss the true message where God is alive in our hearts and truly the King of kings and Lord of lords.

            There are times that I have mislabeled a Mormon as a Christian, thinking they may be a believer because of their moral standards, ethics, and demeanor.  Do they look that much like a Christian that at first glance it’s hard to tell the difference?  Or have we adopted the world’s standard of what a Christian should look like, that it’s hard to differentiate between darkness and light?  What are we teaching our children?  When I tell someone in the world that we homeschool, they say “that’s great”, stating some of the reasons mentioned above.  I justify in my heart that those are great reasons.  But who am I fooling?  Only myself.  Although I want my children to get good grades, be protected, and have good character, those are poor reasons to homeschool if I am missing the primary focus of FIRST training my children to “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” Mark 12:30  Because if they learn that… and live it out loud for the Lord, there will be no mistaking who they are, and more importantly “whose they are”.

            “For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ.  If any man builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw, his work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each man's work. 1 Cor 3:11-13

            So why do you homeschool?  Or better yet…Whom do you homeschool for?

Put On Love

"Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection." Colossians 3:12-14
Through the mundane, routine tasks of homeschooling to the voracious storms that trials bring, it is so very difficult to die to ourselves daily to ‘put on love’. Yet, nevertheless, because we are the ‘elect of God’ that is what the Lord is calling us to do in this verse. Sometimes I just want to retreat from all of my responsibilities of being a wife to my husband, a mother to my children, and a homeschool mom, because it is HARD work physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually to continually put others before me. I am a selfish human being filled with sin. As Job said, “I am vile.” Job 40:4 I, too, identify with him.  However, because I strive to obey Jesus’ command to “love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.” Mark 12:30 and I want my children to do the same, I chose to ‘put on love’ as best that I can on a regular, daily basis. My encouragement to you is to do your best to ‘put on love’ in your household. The month of February is a great time to work towards being more loving to your family because of the importance that society places upon Valentine’s Day, which is really just another time for the retail stores to make extra money! But because the whole ‘love’ thing is surrounding us during this month, use that to you and your family’s best interest instead of how the world celebrates the day.
The other day I received an email from a homeschooling magazine company advertising a ‘Valentine’s Day Unit Study”. As I scrolled through the email advertisement, it listed all these ways to teach your children about Valentine’s Day, like the history of it and it’s celebration, etc. While I was very enticed by the advertisement and I considered purchasing it, because after all how much fun would that be to teach your children these things along with having some great, hands-on activities; there was a side of me that said I did not need it but there was another side of me that said otherwise. “The unit does not cost very much”, I told myself and I knew in my mind I could certainly justify my reason for purchasing it, but I also knew in my heart that was not something that was truly needed in my homeschooling, nor my family life and here were a few reasons why:

• I could put together my own Valentine’s Day Unit Study (if I really wanted to).
• I should not spend additional monies on more homeschooling supplies (especially since I already have so much to begin with that I have yet to use anyways!) Obviously the children learn most by my actions rather than something written on a piece of paper. Plus, just because we drew a little red heart on it, does not mean that our children will feel loved by our actions nor will that cause them to be loving to others in the process.
• I should probably take the money that I was going to use to purchase that unit study and spend it on my husband instead, so I could show him love, after all, he comes before the children!
• My number one reason for not purchasing the unit study: I would become overwhelmed by all that I am to do. I would feel a sense of responsibility to complete the unit because I would not want to waste the money that God has given to our family. The pressure that comes along with that responsibility will cause me to become frustrated as I teach my children in the midst of all of my day to day responsibilities of living and when I am done with my unit on love, I KNOW I would not be putting on love in the process towards my children. I would lose sight of what God was asking me to do.

Here is one of the reasons that homeschooling your children has such advantages over the public/private school system…YOU get to determine what you want to teach your children!!!! Now, was there something inherently wrong with me teaching my children the history of Valentine’s Day or it’s celebration, etc? No! Can I still teach them about the subject matter without purchasing a unit study and spending a lot of money or time? Of course! But I get to make the decision as to what is best for my family and so do you! If you go back to scripture and read what the Word of God says as to what is best for you and your family, it is to ‘put on love’.
My exhortation to you is to find a way, whether that is just through your godly countenance or through your acts of service, to ‘put on love’ towards your family this month (and of course all of the other months) as best as you can. While we know that no one is perfect, we strive to be like Christ, who is PERFECTION. “But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection.” Colossians 3:14

Praise Him In the Storm

All of us have trials from time to time and some trials are greater than others. As our new President takes office we know it will bring about change and uncertainty for our country and our family. Our parental rights are being threatened and we have concerns about the future laws that our children may have to live with. The economy has become worse and worse. Foreclosures are everywhere. Many people have anxiety over job stability. Financial difficulties are becoming a way of life for some. A marriage becomes increasingly more difficult. Conflicts with others are not being resolved. Some fret and worry about the way they are training and teaching their children. Another may have on-going illnesses for either themselves or their children. In-laws or neighbors threaten your homeschooling decision. The list of trials could go on and on.

The world we live in right now is just falling apart. Everyone seems to be affected by it in one way or another, although, the severity may not be the same. You may not be experiencing a trial right at this moment, but we know we will not be without them in our lifetime. Jesus has said, “In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

Even though we know what the Word of God says, sometimes life is so difficult that it is hard to endure the trial set before us. The trial is so big it has become a great storm in our life.

Jesus’ disciples experienced a great trial too. As they were in the boat and the great storm took place on the sea, they cried out to Jesus saying, “Lord, save us! We are perishing!” It was only natural for the disciples to fear for their lives based on the situation they were in, however, they had Jesus in the boat with them! What did they have to fear? Not only was Jesus in the boat with them, but He was taking a nap. Jesus was so comfortable with the situation that they were in, He was sleeping!

“Now when He got into a boat, His disciples followed Him. And suddenly a great tempest arose on the sea, so that the boat was covered with the waves. But He was asleep. Then His disciples came to Him and awoke Him, saying, "Lord, save us! We are perishing!" But He said to them, "Why are you fearful , O you of little faith?" Then He arose and rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was a great calm.” Matthew 8:23-26

As Jesus awoke and rebuked the winds, He also rebuked the disciples with their lack of faith. Jesus was not surprised by the trial that was set before the disciples. Neither is He surprised by the trials that many of us are currently going through.

You might be wondering why I am writing an article about trials and what they have to do with homeschooling. Well, if you believe homeschooling is a way of life like I do, then trials and homeschooling will most definitely go hand in hand! We can’t avoid the storms in our life, but what we can do is have the right attitude while we are going through them. When Jesus was in the boat with the disciples, He was sleeping. He wasn’t fretting or walking back and forth pacing in the boat, no, He was sleeping!

I know when I am in the midst of a storm, I try to have the perspective that “I am sleeping in the boat with Jesus”. I don’t want to freak out or walk around as if I have no joy or hope, (which at times I certainly do feel that way)! However, I do not want my demeanor to always be without joy and hope when I go through a trial, because I personally feel that I am being a bad witness as a believer. I have an opportunity to praise the Lord in the midst of my storm or I can go through life blaming someone else or just plain wallowing in my despair. It is easier for me to do the latter, but wallowing is not something I want to show or teach my children when life gets difficult. We have an opportunity to teach our children about trials as we go through our day. We are able to pray with them and explain to them that Jesus is in control of the situation, He hears our prayers and He loves us more then we love ourselves.

When our children get older they will face trials too. Just because we shelter our children from negative influences today, that does not mean we will be able to shelter them from a trial they will experience as they get older, and perhaps we should not. We go through trials for a reason. They strengthen us and shape us into the character that we have today. Trials refine us and help us to rely on the Lord for our strength as opposed to our own strength. “My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.” James 1:2-4

Trials bring about the workings of the Body of Christ as we are in the middle of our storm. The “Body” helps to bear our burdens. “Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” Galatians 6:2 The Body of Christ is exercising their gifts as they serve the Lord by serving others; this is a beautiful picture of Christ’s love for us and we ought to expose our children to such a wonderful experience. They should see others helping you and you helping others. They should be by your side as you make and serve dinner to a family that is ill or a family who just had a new baby. They should be included and prompted to pray for someone who is in need. Not only will you start to see your children’s spiritual gifts starting to emerge, but this helps to strengthen your child’s prayer life too. Share with them also the answered prayer requests so they can see and hear how God has provided a miracle for the situation.

Don’t hide the storm that you are going through from your children, unless of course it is a marital issue that is not appropriate for them to hear. Go through the storm with Jesus and your family. Teach them that you are relying on the Lord to help you with your situation. Your children will never be able to learn how to go through a real life trial by reading a story in a book because the book could never fully describe the emotion, concern, and distress as much as what our children will witness in real life. Our children will learn how to handle a trial by watching us. If you constantly hide your concerns and emotions from your children, they will never learn from you, other than that you always remained quiet about a situation. As I write this, it is a reminder to myself to pull my children in closer to me as I go through life, the good times and the bad. Again, make sure you use discernment about what is appropriate to share with your children and what is not. Obviously a child under the age of 4 will not be able to comprehend as much as an 8 yr. old or a teenager, but you don’t need to go into great detail as your share with them. You could just tell them that Mommy is having a hard day because she doesn’t feel well, but let’s pray and ask Jesus to heal Mommy, etc. When you feel better make sure you let your child know that Jesus healed Mommy. Continue that pattern as your child grows older and expand the details as appropriate.

If the storm in your life is so great, remember, “the LORD is near to those who have a broken heart.” Psalm 34:18 Don’t be discouraged if you have not been able to teach much history or science to your children while you have been in the storm. The LORD knows what your children should be learning and when they should be learning it. Perhaps He feels they should be learning more about how to biblically handle a trial and how to praise the LORD while we go through them, rather than learning about World History right at this moment!

Praise Him in the storm and show your children how to do the same.